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The lost art of writing

/ andyveilleux / 3 Comments

Writing isn't what it used to be. Blogs have ruined it, some say. Others say my dumb-founded generation, and the generation preceding it ruined it before that. This is too big of an issue to tackle in a blog post, but I wanted to share two prime examples of exceptionally good writing, from the modern era (last thirty years or so). I won't ruin them by explaining why I think they're great piece of writing, so that's up for you to decide. Here they are:

 

"…off to the right of this typewriter, on the floor between the beds, I can see an 8×10 print of Frank Mankiewicz yelling into a telephone at the Democratic Convention in Miami; but that one will never be used, because the god-damn hound put five big claw-holes in the middle of Frank's chest."

– from Hunter S. Thompson's Fear and Loathing: On the Campaign Trail '72

 

"I shaved carefully with an old razor

the man who had once been young and

said to have genius; but

that's the tragedy of the leaves,

the dead ferns, the dead plants;
and I walked into a dark hall
where the landlady stood
execrating and final,
sending me to hell,
waving her fat, sweaty arms
and screaming
screaming for rent
because the world has failed us
both"

– from Charles Bukowski's The Tragedy of the Leaves

G20 protests: what journalism means for democracy

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Recently, I found myself discussing the media coverage of the G20 protest with Hobb. We both found the media coverage to be shameful, and often useless. Not ALL media coverage, but a great majority of it. There was very little discussion of the Black Bloc, aside from stereotypical, recycled words. Read this article about the group by the Toronto Star entitled "Behind the Black Bloc." The article fails to really dive into anything remotely “behind” the group. What exactly is the Black Bloc? The author doesn’t know.

The author refers to the Black Bloc as a group, “many members of the Black Bloc;” and even as a tactic, “They embraced the Black Bloc tactic.” I understand it’s difficult to define, but pick a reference. The title seems to suggest the author understands it as both. Regardless, let’s get into the article more.

I’d like to share a few quotes with you that I found disturbing: “A Communist group set off a flare, distracting the crowd and police alike — and the mob took off across Queen.” The author later concludes the article by quoting a woman, “Violence just brings more violence,” a woman said into a megaphone as an anarchist set fire to a police cruiser. “What you guys are doing, it’s breaking my heart.” In case you missed it, the Black Bloc is both anarchist and communist at the same time. The author is apparently a little behind on his understanding of politics.

I don't mean to unfairly target the Toronto Star. Their newsroom did a decent job IN COMPARISON with many of the other big newspapers in the country. That assertion is not good enough, however. The CBC did a better job than the TorStar (I can hear the hard-Right grumbling about leftists and communists already, praying for the start of Sun TV), but even it was average at best.

It will take the determination of a solid researcher to dig up the true meaning of the G20 protests in historical and cultural context. It saddens me how badly context is missing in today's media. I read mentions of how crucial the G20 protests (and arrests) were, but it was among mostly obscure media sources. Not altogether surprising, as these obscure sources are some of the only ones practicing real journalism [i.e. journalism as a public duty to protect democracy].

Hobb pointed out a couple of important facts regarding the G20 protests. It was the largest mass arrest in Canada’s History (over 1000 arrested). One foreign journalist commented the detention centre was worse than those kept by Palestinian authorities. There were several instances of “cops gone wild” as he puts it (keep in mind he teaches Crime and Punishment). The extortionist cost of $1 billion dollars for security at the event. How often did you hear these facts reported by the media?

Where’s the investigate journalism? How many cops infiltrated the Black Bloc? I’ve spoken with people who knew some personally, and they were arrested multiple times by the uniformed police. How much damage was done by the Black Bloc and other individuals during the protests? Where were the police during the violent part of some of the protest? Who’s being held responsible for the police inventing a new law to arrest anyone within 5 metres of the fence? Who is being, or has been punished for this undemocratic discretion? Were there any human rights violations from police officers? Was any injured while they were in custody? Talk to a few lawyers (not just the solo one I heard on the news, who comes off as a conspiracy theorist from the quotes I heard), find out if the people arrested have a case.

Journalism has a responsibility to the public to be their watch-dog against authority and the “powers that be.” I keep coming back to a quote by Thomas Jefferson: "Our liberty depends on the freedom of the press, and that cannot be limited without being lost." The freedom of the press is being challenged by financial constraints, and a lack of trust from the public. The integrity of journalism has been steadily eroding for some time, and it’s leading to a decrease in trust of journalists. Journalists must restore the peoples’ trust in their work, or else democracy will go out the window. I will write at length about the erosion of trust in a later post.

Sudbury: a case study in foreign ownership

/ andyveilleux / 4 Comments

I came across an interesting article today concerning Canadian management statistics, and the oft-discussed (in Sudbury, and nationally I imagine) debate over foreign ownership. The article is written by economist Stephen Gordon, and is a response to an opinion piece written by Jeffrey Simpson in the Globe and Mail. To summarize the post, let me quote the Stephen’s initial reaction to reading Simpson’s article: “Oh god. Economic nationalism will be an issue. Spare us. #budget2010”

I've been reading Dr. Stephen Gordon's work for many months now, and his blog has always been informative and well-written. Stephen is an economics professor working at Laval University in Quebec City, Quebec, Canada. His thinking regarding the failings of economic nationalism would be widely unpopular in a mining town like Sudbury (yes, it is still a mining town, despite claims to the contrary). That being said, his thinking is not wrong on this issue.

In some of my history courses with Dr. Mark Kuhlberg regarding environmental history, and northern Ontario history, I was fortunate enough to learn some of the failings of the xenophobic policy that is economic nationalism. Many a time it was not the foreign companies raping and pillaging the landscape, but our own Canadian companies. It was the foreign companies who often invested capital into repairing damaged eco-systems and re-greening initiatives, especially in the pulp and paper industry. To be certain, Mark is an authority in the field of pulp and paper industry.

All that being said, I do see the local case studies regarding foreign ownership, primarily in the mining industry. Let's take two polarized examples; Xstrata, and Vale. When it came time to negotiate with workers in their Sudbury operations, Xstrata and the CAW agreed upon a new 3-year contract this year without a work stoppage. When it came time for Vale and the USW to negotiate a settlement, there was a long and bitter strike, which ended up lasting about a year. Cries of evil foreign ownership were rampant in the city, and still are, at least among many of the working class individuals in this city I've spoken with [Note: my father is a miner at Xstrata].

It's worth reading Stephen's posting about foreign ownership, for a few reasons. Pay close attention to the opinions of Canadian management regarding education, and their lower education than their American counter-parts. Also, look at the discussion of how foreign-controlled operations are run as compared to domestically-owned operations. There are many arguments on both sides of the coin, so don't just write off foreign-ownership as evil because it's a trendy view in the Nickel City.

Sudbury: the great youth brain drain continues

/ andyveilleux / 2 Comments

While it is not news that Sudbury has had a difficult time keeping young graduates in the city following their graduation, having southern Ontario newspapers cover it is relatively new (at least in this blogger's eyes). I am referring to an article in the Globe and Mail written by Adam Radwanski on Friday, which you can read here. I'm not going to go into the politics of having a southern newspaper write about the north, but it's a great thing that Laurentian Univeristy is finally getting more southern exposure. Time to discuss the article.

 

I'll begin with a quote that summarizes the article: "But ultimately, employers must have enough high-end jobs to keep graduates around permanently. And For all of Sudbury’s progress, that’s where the constraints typical for northern Ontario cities still fall leave it short." Beginning a sentence, much less a paragraph with 'but,' and some of the obvious grammar errors, may send some of our more grammar-savvy readers into a frenzy, but that's not the focus of the discussion.

Sudbury's exodus of educated youth is nothing new, nor is the discussion of it. I cannot count the amount of people who I've talked to about it, in both the private and public sector. The discussion is usually centered on my future, or the future of associates of mine, in Sudbury. I'm at the age now (23) where seeking a career is a priority and something I’ve been working on for quite some time. I’m not opposed to leaving town for work, in fact I’d welcome it some days, but in my heart I know I’d prefer Sudbury. Where does that leave me?

Well, I’ve applied to work at some of the typical, available options in town. These include Laurentian University, the Greater Sudbury Chamber of Commerce, Cambrian College, the city itself, the provincial offices, and federal offices. Beyond that, there are a host of other public development corporations, several private institutions, local media, and community colleges I’ve applied to also. I’ve worked for some of them, and been interviewed by more of them, but in the end I have not found a career out of it. Once again, where does that leave me?

At the moment, I’m continuing my studies. I’ve already got my Honours Bachelor of Arts in History from Laurentian University, my diploma from Print Journalism from Cambrian College, and will be finishing up a BA in Political Science this year. At 23 years old (24 when I graduate PoliSci), that’s not too bad of a resume. Add in all of the local volunteering, my hefty work resume, the various sports teams and committees, and the internships I’ve completed, and it looks even nicer. The sad reality, however, is that it’s difficult to find entry-level careers in meaningful work in this city. That’s the reality of the situation.

Simply put, the city needs to refocus their strategy on the youth brain drain. I understand that career turn-over has become a bit more stagnant due to the “harsh economic times,” as my favourite professor likes the call it. I also understand that companies want to hire people with experience, because they don’t have to train them. The problem with this two factors is they are causing educated people of my generation to have to leave town for employment. What’s the solution?

I would suggest more internships as a start. With internships, recent graduates, and even students, are able to gather valuable work experience. The issue with these internships is that they are usually too short-term. Take my current internship as an example. As a summer contract, I’m working for the Greater Sudbury Chamber of Commerce. My contract expires this Friday. In total, I’ll have spent about three months and change here. Was it valuable? Definitely. The issue is that while it’s been a positive experience, it hasn’t nearly been long enough.

Another fellow Chamber intern has been here for almost a year, and then will be departing because her contract is up as well. Without diving too far behind closed doors, the Chamber will be sad to see her go. She has become an integral part of events planning here. The Chamber has asked for an extension, but has been declined. It simply is not in the budget to offer a new contract without government funding (remember, we’re a non-profit organization.) It is probable a new intern will be brought in, which will not be as efficient as retraining is a must for any new intern.

I’m really not sure what the answers are for this problem. It seems Sudbury, and Northern communities in general, have struggled mightily to attract educated youth into the work-force. I want to hear from you. How can Sudbury work towards attracting more educated youth into the workforce? Will a new government help the situation? Will the municipal candidates positions on this matter in the October elections?

Life after Facebook, and why you need to get on Twitter

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Hi everyone, I wanted to change up my usual blogging routine by offering you a guest-blog from a friend of mine, Matt Southern. His story is a fairly interesting one, as he is a PR graduate, who decided to delete his Facebook account months ago, and only keep his Twitter. Without further adieu:

Twitter is one of the most powerful tools of the post-modern era for communicating with individuals and reaching an audience. It’s direct and succinct with unmatched user-friendliness and accessibility. However, after over a year of being an avid twitter user I’ve discovered one simple truth about the social networking service: it’s not for everyone.

Too often I’ve seen people join twitter only to post a few dozen tweets before abandoning the service altogether. To them I would say they’re doing it wrong. You could argue that they didn’t give it a chance but I would argue that they never learned how to use it to suit their needs. It’s remarkable how in 140 character updates there’s truly something out there for everyone.

To get the most out of your experience on Twitter you have to decide what you seek to gain from it. If keeping up with current events is as important to you as it is to me then you need not look any further. There’s no denying it’s one of the best news services available, I almost always get breaking news on Twitter before I get it anywhere else. However, the people who sign up only to follow their favorite celebrities and athletes may never discover that it’s actually a very useful news source.

If you’re a creator of digital content such as a blogger, vlogger, graphic designer, writer of short stories etc. there’s no better way to directly reach an online audience than through Twitter, especially if you’ve built up a healthy number of followers. Similarly, if you’re a consumer of content and like to keep up with your favorite bloggers, youtubers and graphic artists then you can do that as well.

One of my personal favorite ways to use Twitter is as a personal contact maker. I love connecting with people who are passionate about the same things I am. Twitter offers me that opportunity that I otherwise wouldn’t get in real life. For example, living in a small Canadian city where Hockey is the sport of choice it’s difficult to connect with people who are as passionate as I am about pro wrestling and mixed martial arts. Twitter provides me an outlet to share my thoughts and opinions with hundreds of people who are just as passionate, many of whom I’ve developed friendships with even though we’ve never met.

Additionally, as a Public Relations grad and current student of Communications I aspire to have a career involving social media one day. I value Twitter as a business contact maker as I’ve connected with many PR professionals and look to them for guidance as I prepare to begin my career in the next year or so.

After a while I became so satisfied with my Twitter experience that I did what others would believe to be unthinkable: I deleted my Facebook account. Quite simply, it wasn’t doing it for me for me anymore. I see the utilitarian value in Facebook for keeping in touch with friends and family but there’s numerous other ways to do that. E-mail, instant messaging, text messaging, or even good old-fashioned phone calls to name a few. If you take that aspect away there was nothing else to keep me coming back. I wasn’t getting any valuable news updates that I couldn’t otherwise get on Twitter. I wasn’t making any new connections because Facebook doesn’t offer the ability to view what people all over the world are talking about. I had a very limited audience to introduce to new blogs I was writing at the time. Plus, the privacy issues were starting to get to me so I felt the time was right to delete my account altogether. I haven’t looked back since. Twitter more than satisfies my social networking needs and I still keep in touch with everyone I used to while I had Facebook, proving that life does indeed go on.

sex, sex, and SEX

/ andyveilleux / 4 Comments

Well, now that you're all here because of the keyword "sex" (half-joking…), I'd like to open a serious dialogue about the topic.

First, I believe that we live in a society where sex is rarely spoken about, and is treated as though it's something to hide. If a person speaks about it too frankly, or too often, they are classified as either a pervert or a slut, and sometimes both. That being said, I still talk about it openly, honestly, and relatively often (labels/stereotypes be damned!).

The response I get when I discuss it is usually something sexist. "Typical," most people say, "a guy wanting to talk about sex." HELLO!? Women have sexual needs too, and some of them are not afraid to discuss it openly and honestly, if they trust you. There's some mystifying sexist belief that men talk about sex, because they're the perverted gender. I've had far more discussions about sex with females, and not just because I had a sexual interest in the person I was conversing with (because I know everyone was thinking that was the reason).

As a male in his twenties, I become pigeon-holed the moment I bring up sex oftentimes. As soon as I mention the subject I get the above-mentioned 'typical' response. It's frustrating for a number of reasons. First, I legitimately enjoy discussing sex. It's a fascinating subject, and explains a lot about the person you're talking with. Second, despite the conventionally-held belief, as a male, I don't want to sleep with every girl I try to chat up. Third, sex SHOULD be discussed in great detail, it's one of the most important parts of life (if not the most important, depending if you talk to heavy supporters of evolution and general supporters of humanity's on-going existence :P). 

To be honest, I've been incredibly surprised by a lot of my conversations regarding sex. Some people have zero (or almost zero) experience with sex, well into their twenties. Despite the obvious assumption, some of these individuals are not overly-religious, and are actually attractive. On the flip-side, some of my friends have a vast amount of sexual experience (yes, even some of the ladies too, who aren't "sluts.")

It's always interesting to have perspective into the sex-life of friends. Humans are naturally social creatures, and therefore love discussing things we can relate to. EVERYBODY can relate to sexuality, even if they haven't had sex before. It's rare to find an interesting topic, which everybody can discuss. Interesting + relative + passionate = great conversation. And if there are three things I know about sex; it's that these words describe it well, at least most of the time. ; )

What are your thoughts about sexuality? Are people open enough about it? Do you find people who discuss it honestly and openly? Are you open and honest when discussing it with others? How strong are the stereotypes regarding sex?

With great [influence] comes great responsibility

/ andyveilleux / 2 Comments

Over the past 36 hours, some interesting things have happened. I got to witness first-hand how influential some of my writing could be. I want to share it as a case-study for all of you to follow.

Recently, I have been reading a lot of articles concerning influence, so I guess it is fitting that I got a practical crash-course in it. Influence is not the amount of followers you have on Facebook, or Twitter. Influence is how many of those people listen to you, and heed what you're saying. There are a lot of sides to this story, and many opinions, and I will try to go over as many of them as I can without violating any of my sources' privacy.

Many of you will recall the ordeal I had with Bodyworks (which was not truthfully their fault at all, as the blog posts will inform you) yesterday. I was contacted by an individual advising me of a course at Bodyworks. They were not authorized to market on behalf of Bodyworks, but were running their class out of the gym. The text message I received seemed like the person was pretending to be a friend of mine, talking about how plans had changed, and they were going to be meeting me at the gym at a different time for the course (which they spoke at length about).

My realization of influence started with a phone call this afternoon, around 4:15pm. A friend filled me in on the course instructor's side of the story (who he is friends with, and had just met with at the time of his call). He warned me that my influence was greater than I thought, and I should wield it responsibly, as the instructor's course was now cancelled. I informed him that I would talk with the owner, and discuss the course being reinstated, due to the miscommunication. The question is: what set me off, and made me pursue this?

First, I should say that it has been mentioned several times that must people would have just ignored the text message. I am not most people, in this context, for a number of reasons. I am involved with social media consulting, strategy creation, etc. This certainly doesn't make me an expert marketer, but does make me an interested and active marketer. Also, I am a trained journalist, who still practices journalism, and pays particularly close attention to ethics of companies. Lastly, I am always interested in legal decisions as they pertain to companies' decisions, and i was certain text message marketing was illegal.

To address these concerns, let me explain chronologically. I was at work when I received the message. I was annoyed by it, and frustrated with it. I feel text-message marketing is unethical, because texts should be used for personal communication only. I have been informed the text message was meant as a personal message rather than a marketing message, but there were definitely elements of marketing in it regardless.

Upon receiving the text, I fired my own back. I included the fact that it was illegal to text message market someone without their consent, and asked the identity of the person messaging me. I asked if they were Bodyworks, or a company representing Bodyworks. In their reply, they did not address my questions, and told me to take a 'chill pill,' 'learn how to breathe,' and etc in a rather snarky way.

I sent an email to Bodyworks, demanding an explanation. I was commited to uncovering who was at fault, and why they were getting in touch with me. I was never a member of the gym, and they couldn't have gotten my number that way (was my line of thinking at the time). As it turns out, it was meant for the previous owner of this phone number, and he gave consent for it (which would not become fully clear until a bit later yesterday). Bodyworks replied to me, and was quite unimpressed with the message I had received, and how it made their company look. 

The texter messaged me today to apologize for the miscommunication, and I accepted their apology. The issue is this: Bodyworks has stopped them from being able to teach their course out of the gym. I understand Bodyworks' decision in the case, but have asked them to reconsider. I like to support athletics and fitness whenever possible, and I felt this was a great avenue for both. I expressed this concern to the representative of Bodyworks, and he understood my concerns. He informed me he was not pleased with the situation in general, but would reconsider allowing the course to operate out of Bodyworks. When he visits Sudbury in a few weeks, he plans to discuss it with his staff before making a decision.

It is important to say that Bodyworks' response to my concerns was swift, and helpful. They never tried to brush me off, or leave me hanging. They treated all inquiries and concerns seriously, and respected my perseverance in getting to the bottom of the situation. The gentleman I dealt with, who I believe owns the company, can not be blamed for their decision to close the course. They were looking after what could have become a legal issue, which all companies must take seriously in this day and age. That being said, he is reasonable, and I'm sure he will fully consider allowing the course to use his facility. 

The lessons to be learned:

– Let marketing professionals handle the marketing, and always consult with the company who is helping you out when launching any sort of campaign. (I was told it was a personal text message, but I've had the phone number for over a year, and this is the first time they contact me. How many friends do you have that don't text you in over a year?)

– One needs to be careful of how much influence they wield, and how they choose to use it. It is possible that I was hasty in reporting on the entire issue. I did not report any inaccuracies or misinformation, and have nothing to apologize for factually, but my friend suggested I should consider how much influence I have before reporting on such issues so quickly. On the other hand, I consulted with some friends who felt the reporting was justified, and that I was soft on the people who sent me a message. Some people felt my response was unnecessary, but not quite uncalled for. The spectrum ranges greatly on this issue.

– Text-message marketing is a difficult path to tread. With the frequency of number changes and lost phones, it is vital to double-check (or 'vet' as journalists say) your contacts, to ensure they are still the people you think they are. Not sending out a message in over a year, and then sending out a  marketing message is treacherous legal territory to walk on.

– In communications, always work fast and efficiently to clear up any miscommunication and answer queries. A simple text message response to my initial questions would have prevented all of this mess from happening. An explanation of who was texting me, what their purpose was, and who they were representing was all that was required. Ignoring a situation does not make it go away. Unfortunately, I think they got more than they bargained for when they accidentally fired that text to a journalist/marketing professional, and then encouraged me.

All things considered, I have no ill will towards the course instructor or gym. I have offered to consult the instructor regarding his marketing strategy next time, to ensure it goes smoothly, and hopefully help build his following. I think the program sounds rather interesting, and you can look into what was going to be taught (Systema – a Russian martial art) here.

If only I would have tripped that burglar, Uncle Ben… er… wait… 😉

Guys talk about their feelings…seriously!

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I talked for a few hours with a dear friend of mine last night. He's been having a bit of a rough go of things, and I wanted to discuss them with him. As one would imagine, the pain involves love.

I think many will find it interesting that guys do, in fact, talk about love, hurt, and painful emotions we are experiencing (note: you may close your mouths at any time ladies [and I bet most girls are surprised I made an open mouth joke that was not sexual by nature!]). While writing this post, I had the privilege of stumbling upon a post by my friends over at WTF is up with my lovelife?! that discussed how many guys are actually reading and following along with their site (which was intended for women). They discuss being surprised by the response from guys, who legitimately want to discuss their love lives, and ask for advice. Imagine that, guys seeking advice AND discussing romantic, mushy things?! Bizarro world, right? Wrong.

In fact, there are some guys that often discuss their romantic lives with one another, at least in my friends circle (and no, by "romantic" I don't mean sexual). I'd like to talk a bit about what I learned from my discussion with a friend going through a serious break-up. Read their post first, so you can understand the study they mention which discusses how guys tend to store up emotions, resulting in massive break-downs, and being more hurt than their female counter-parts when things go down the tubes. It will put this in proper context, I think.

There are no words you can say to a friend to make them feel better when they're suffering through the aftermath of love. When love is lost, a part of you is as well. Time is the only thing that will heal you, but time does not pass in moments like these. Instead of the age-old cliché that time heals all wounds, I would like to offer a modification. Experience heals all wounds, at least to a degree where life is livable again. Let's face it, that person you love, is never going to go away 100 per cent. They will always have a special ability to irritate, anger, and even delight you. It's weird, but it's true.

Time passing in and of itself, does nothing. If one sits in solitude and broods over their loss, one does not heal. The scar tissue will also become much greater. I tend to brood when I'm miserable, and it's not healthy. It's a lonely place, losing love, and you can feel very much alone for some time afterwards. The key is to make sure you're trying to experience life again. GET OUT OF THE HOUSE. Go spend time with people. Get out and talk to other people. Sure, you'll get a lot of the same responses: "I know it sucks, but you'll feel better soon," "To be honest, I didn't really like her," "You're better off without her," etc etc etc….  but it's better than nothing. Conversation lets you express what you're feeling (well, try your best to express that which can not truly be expressed – and trust me, we poets have been trying to express it forever, and failing).

It's interesting how friendship is. Last night my friend apologized for being 'selfish' by talking so much about the storm of badness that is currently his life. I laughed, and explained how it's funny the more modest/self-aware guy friends tend to feel like they are doing a disservice to a friend by a discussing their problems. If it were a disservice of friendship, then what is friendship for? (Note: this does not apply to THOSE friends who always have "issues," and always bring them up, who are actually annoying because they're so woe-is-me). Life is meant to be discusses, and shared, with your friends. Communication is great; it brings people together, and makes life that much more enjoyable as a result. Guys, don't be afraid to talk about your problems. It's unhealthy not to, and it will lead to some serious problems for you.

Do iPhone users have more sex? Does it matter?

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I'm sure everyone's read the survey, or at least seen the headline, 'iPhone users have more sex' or 'iSlut'… It goes without saying that the survey is a little informal. It was published on free online dating site OkCupid's blog, OkTrends yesterday, and has been generating a phenomenal amount of buzz. The statistics in it are not that significant, unless put in the proper context. Here is a summary of the stats, quoted from the Times' article "iPhone users have more sex" (linked above):

"The accompanying graph shows male iPhone users have had an average of 10 sexual partners by age 30, while BlackBerry users have had 8.1. What's worse? Those poor losers with Androids have only had 6. The best news may be for female iPhone users who have an average of 12.3 sexual partners by age 30, as compared with 8.8 for BlackBerry users and 6.1 for Android users."

Is it significant that iPhone users apparently have had more sexual partners? I don't think so. The significance lies in another context of the statistics; the gender statistics. Did you notice that women had more sexual partners than men by the age of 30? I think this speaks volumes for equality. I'm not suggesting that this tiny survey is akin to women getting the right to vote or anything, but I think it's great that women are feeling comfortable enough to engage in a healthy amount of sexual activity, and to share that fact.

Also, I'd like to see a comparison between the users on dating sites, in terms of sexual partners, and the non-users. Do people on dating sites have more partners? I'll be willing to guess they do. That's not a condemnation of dating sites, or the people that go on them. That would be so hypocritical of me, considering I've used dating sites to a fair degree over the past few years. To hell with the social stigma of dating sites. I've met a lot of interesting people through them (after weeding through a lot of uninteresting people). That's a discussion for another time (oh, you know, next week :P).

There is an issue with a survey like this: honesty. Are these numbers accurate? How do we know a lot of people didn't downplay their numbers? How do we know people didn't exaggerate their numbers? We don't. Still, this survey was an interesting one, and it's worth reading over the article.

What's your opinion of dating sites? Do you think the fact iPhone users have more sexual partners in this survey is significant? Do you think the numbers are high or low for a person at 30 years old?

Double standards: an interesting experiment via WTF is up with my love life

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Now, I've been following WTF is up with my love life?! for quite awhile now. To summarize, it is a website concerned with anything relating to dating, relationships, romance, love, etc. It's a great blog, and features some interesting guest bloggers, and neat experiments. I encourage everyone to follow the blog, and real through it.

First, you'll learn a lot about love, sex, etc., especially if you're a bit unexperienced with the whole game (not meant in a disrespectful way, but dating, sex, love definitely have a game element to them). Second, you'll find great stories, which you should be able to relate to. Third, you can ask them for advice concerning your own love life. Fourth, and most importantly, They unveil a little of the underbelly of love and sex, which most people pretend doesn't exist, or deny the existence of!

Now, onto the experiment I mention in the title. The experiment is appropriately named "My "Experimental" WTF?! Summer," and it features a girl named Roz. She set out a list of ten rules for her summer, including things such as "I must approach a new guy every night hat I'm out on the town," and "If the kisses are lacking, then everything else probably is too. I must pursue no further." Her experiment, as you may notice, throws a lot of conventional gender roles on their head. She is charging herself with approaching guys, and in many cases, makes some of those important "first moves" that guys are apparently supposed to make according to the stereotypes. Also, she is going to be physical with these guys on the first date.

The experiment has been ongoing for over two months now. Roz recently posted an update to the challenge called "The WTF?! Summer Challenge: Midterm Review." She discusses how the experiment is going so far, and what she has learned thus far (in ten lessons!) I personally think the experiment is a great idea. I've read a lot of articles on dating, romance, and sex that feel so fake, and don't feel like reality in the least. I enjoy reading about someone who takes an honest approach to romance, and gets into the nitty-gritty of cross-gender relations. I encourage everyone to read the blog, and let me know what you think about it. I've often considered writing about my love life, and am happy to find that a lot of people can do so in an honest and open way, without losing their anonymity. The comments are yours. 🙂