Month: April 2012

clear head of dawn

/ andyveilleux / 2 Comments

there was always a chance to admit it,

and you were so annoyed,

so annoyed,

as it that qualified anything.

 

I didn't care then and I don't now,

and if anything a clear head of dawn

has increased the anger a few steps further.

How dare you

collides with

why would you

and the fog was too obvious a simile.

 

There is a cloudiness to intention

an excusable amount of distasteful action

and reality should also set in.

 

And what of intentions?

 

As if they mattered as anything more than a building block of furniture

in hell.

wake up you star

/ andyveilleux / Leave a comment

nobody has time for spell checks and editing

and if you do

I question your poetry.

 

If it doesn't explode off of your brain and imaginary tongue

like ballistic missiles aimed at all the soft parts

-the testicles, tits and clits of the people-

I don't read you and won't hear of you.

 

Wake up.

 

That's it,

wake up.

 

You're not dreaming and I'm not in here to be your friend

so wake up and get your shit together

there's no cuddly fuzzy bear with honey flowing out of his furry ass

coming to encourage you along your merry way

that bear will slap you in half and sit on your face for no reason:

slap, sit, dead.

 

Life happens in dead time

perception be damned

you are an exploded star and we are just watching from too far away to know the difference.

idiocy of our idiocy

/ andyveilleux / Leave a comment

I have to write something smart

to replace that last idoitic waste

of space and life

and what are we actually doing

besidses throwing life and time and space at our problems

i guess we throw money

but money is human-made

-AS IF TIME ISN'T-

feel it out physics or well, 

science

feelings

irreconcible differences

or hadn't you heard?

Well,

I had heard and saw the second coming

but many more than that too

and nothing change.

 

Time is a rubber stamp

no definite moments

– a building falls, bombs burst, a baby born-

just a stream that does not always

follow the path of least

or most

resistance.

As gravity, we think it exists and

you are an absolute idiot for believing in it or disbelieving it,

take you pick you absolutel idiot.

 

Disheartening,

but we're all ignorant and don't forget it,

and I love you anyways,

but I'm an ignorant idiot too so take that for what it's worth.

screaming at you

/ andyveilleux / 1 Comment

I am SCREAMING,

did you feel that?

Well, 

I didn't scream, but I felt like screaming.

At this, at you, at the screen, come a little closer, please?

 

Deficit-running, your job, or mine,

but throw around pay raises for the rich,

you cliché pseudo-intellectual.

Yes we know about that,

everybody does.

 

Bang you way into the system if you want to change it,

classic revolution is meant for non-complacent, non-fat., non-first-world places,

bang your way up with your mouth, face, fists, vagina or dick,

make it where your mom and dad never did,

and take home the five figure pay raise to make them so proud

time is money but not really

because it isnt

it seriously isnt.

 

You are dying,

I am dying,

the money is seperate

and good luck with that crisis when it hits your 'furrows of worry' and bank accounts.

Matches and paper tigers

/ andyveilleux / Leave a comment

the odds were not to sink of swim

because that ain't man-shit,

it's paddle or drown into the history of other failures

so moody

these blues

or maybe vibrant reds that inspire

and push the boundaries in a meta-physical fake uncaring

and loving way

as if boundaries existed and one knew how to push them further.

hint, you don't know,

they don't exist,

and I meant that,

THEY DON'T EXIST,

not where it counts – in your head,

that's where the magics happens and the slight of hand

revealing poems constructed in a minute

consuuming life energy

red bull on your soul

leave you tired, depleted, pretending to be broken

you just need a day off – lucid- well the lottery won't give it

the machine needs you.

What machine?

You communist fucker,

christianity as a scape-goat,

like bashing it makes you relevant and makes history nicer

and between the lines

but it isn't.

History is not between the lines here

or anywhere else,

and it made no sense to attack ghosts as if it meant

you had a right hook worth anything

you don't

you paper tiger

I hope you go play with matches.

bar down potential

/ andyveilleux / 1 Comment

and why potential?

Here's a wasted line.

Out of all words it being the most damning

as opposed to it being the most damning of all words

passive aggressive, as if it matters, to meaning transference,

or did it matter for transferring meaning?

Do you follow?

potential is overrated

uncalculable significant guess work and magic in one easy to consume

gift

sometimes not given

or delivered.

No Christmas coming.

There's no stronger way to put the world on one's shoulders as

heavy

titanic

a crushing load that can sink quickly

despite the optimism of hope flowing from

– is it freedom from or freedom to –

and as if that matters,

we're talking potential.

 

One is free to walk down the aisles or sections

of any city-paved street

provincial or federal park sanctioned

reserve land

or packet of earth otherwise laid claim to

completely free 

in the freest of free ways

and to hell with the price of freedom in a bigger picture.

 

freedom condemns you to try to live up to the potential set out for you

and it's your fault whether you stumble succeed or hit the ball the

fuck

out of the park.

well,

bar down

and to hell with you.

the taste of blood

/ andyveilleux / Leave a comment

Blood grows on you,

figuratively,

it’s literal growth being so obviously internal.

It’s more the taste of it,

something external

but from the mouth the tongue the sensation the mind the craving

one tightly knit dance of destruction

One could leave it to the sharks

not as methodical as (wo)man

but honest

at least honest

a shark feeds and you know it feeds humans lie about it.

We swim with gills soaked in blood pretending it just happened to be in the water

Open letter to The Muse

/ andyveilleux / Leave a comment

This email was sent out Sunday morning [April 1, 2012] to members of The Muse and the Canadian University Press.

My fellow Musers,

It was with great anger and sadness that I received a phone call from Jessie last night [Saturday, March 31] informing me I would not be given a position with our newspaper next year. While my qualms about the ridiculous nature of our hiring policy have been publicly known all year, I would have never guessed that such a blatant example of their failings would be presented this year. I was unfortunate enough to be interviewed by our current Editor-in-Chief and Business Manager, who seem to be unable to put the events of NASH – which I did nothing wrong at, and represented us proudly at – behind them. For these reasons, I was passed over for not only the Editor-in-Chief job, but for ANY job at the paper next year.
You have all worked with me this year, and you know the passion I have for journalism. You also all know that I am willing to help at any time, and that I am friendly in the news room and outside of it. My commitment to The Muse is unwavering, and I made that clear in both the EIC interview, and the interview for other positions. This hiring process has not selected the best individuals for the job, but the people who got along best with the EIC and Business Manager, and answered their beck and call. This became painfully obvious to me over the past week with this round of hiring.
The reason I was given for not being hired for the EIC job was that JMB took more of a leadership role with the referendum. The referendum had nothing to do with journalism, and was a PR event best left to our Business Manager, but I still helped a little with it. Journalism is not about getting students to vote for us. Journalism is about bringing the information to students, and writing stories geared towards. Journalism is about digging for information students need to know, but are not being given by the institutions that should be transparent. The battle of Paul with both MUNSU and MUN PR are evidence of that. Unfortunately, Paul also had to battle with the “leadership” of the paper on occasion, which is counter-productive. Our pro-MUNSU feature earlier in the year, and having Michael Walsh as part of “The Muse” in his column reek of too close of a relationship with student government. We got far too buddy-buddy with them during our referendum as well, which is something that shocked me.
This paper doesn’t need cheerleaders, it needs grunt who are willing to knock on doors and put their feet to the pavement for stories. I do both of those things, and I love doing them. This email isn’t a missile aimed at the hiring committee. It is however, a statement of how botched the hiring was, and how we did not get the best employees for the job due to politics.
Explain how someone with a year inside a professional newsroom, a year as an assistant editor, two years as Editor-In-Chief, who also freelances for Canadian Press did not get ANY job within our newsroom. Searching for answers? He is my brother.
Also think about how someone who has worked with magazines, newspapers, news wires, online news sources, television, blogs, and every form of publishable media across Canada for three+ years did not get a job – not even his incumbent job as Sports Editor, which was given to his understudy of a few months – in our newsroom. That person was me. My experience did not matter, because the decision was made before I put on my tie and dress clothes, and trudged my way into MUN campus.
If there is one thing journalists should never do, it is stand by quietly and merely be observers. We write about injustice, we seek out injustice. In this case, injustice is in our backyard. That being said, I have fought injustice wherever I could in my life and this is no different. I wanted to make my fight public, because I know some of you will support me, although others may not feel comfortable doing so for political reasons. I am not chastising anyone for choosing a side, and I do not want anyone replying to this thread. I would hope that those supporting me will contact me personally, and I will keep your support private.
I also wanted to make this public, because this fight will probably be a long one. I will be reviewing the constitution (which I am here asking for a digital copy of), discussing the matter with the Board of Directors, and also seeking answers at MUN HR.
I want The Muse to be the best that it can be, and this hiring process has botched that. I will be doing anything in my power to make sure The Muse can improve its reputation next year, and I know most of you feel the same.
Sincerely,
Andy Veilleux
Sports Editor of The Muse