When you’re hanging out with somebody, when is it considered a date, as opposed to just hanging out?
I had a discussion this afternoon with a friend, and we were tossing around ideas about it. I felt it was an interesting topic, that many of us have thought about, and it should be discussed further.
Let’s start at the beginning; what is a date?
I would like to define a date as a plan to hang out with somebody, who you have a romantic interest in, and are interested in feeling out in person. The crucial part of that sentence is the “in person” ending.
It is evident social media has changed the way we meet, and get to know, potential love interests. Whether it’s through meeting people online, through facebook, or one of the still-wrongly-stigmatized dating websites, the game has changed.
You can get to know somebody very well through online interactions. I’ve had close friends I had never met in person, and whether I met them through social media, chatting, or online video games, some of those friendships were much stronger then some of the face-to-face friendships I had.
Let’s get back to the topic of dating. When you make plans with somebody, how do you know if it’s a date? Well, sometimes you get that funny, sometimes awkward, moment when one of the daters(datees?) will joke about how it is a date, which solidifies it as a date most of the time. Aside from that, it’s actually hard to tell.
I’ve gone out for coffee, or a movie, or a walk, with several girls, and was not sure if it was a date. I’ve had feelings for some of them, some of them had feelings for me, but does that make it a date?
I don’t know if there is a way to tell what is, and was it not, a date.
The better question to ask is whether it needs to be classified as a date for it to be romantically significant. I don’t think it does.

Over the last two weeks, I’ve been fortunate enough to get a lot of practical experience in journalism. I’ve gone through the interviews I spoke of in my last blog post, but also accomplished so much more than that. It began a week ago, when I attended a press conference at Laurentian University where the provincial government announced funding for Sudbury’s three post-secondary institutions, you can read my article about it here. It was a great experience to attend such a high profile press conference, which featured John Milloy, Minister of Training, Colleges and Universities, and Minister of Research and Innovation, as well as MPP Rick Bartolucci, and the presidents of the three institutions.
I was also fortunate enough to travel with the Cambrian volleyball teams for the weekend, and cover what it is like to go on the road as a varsity athlete. The article will be available in the new edition of the Shield (which can be picked up at Cambrian College for free, and is being released next week), and you can also read the results from the weekend here. It was a memorable experience to be on the road with the teams, even though I had gone through the experience of being a varsity athlete in the fall. It was much different covering it from the eyes of a journalist, where observation was crucial, and getting into the “zone” for playing was non-existent.
I was fortunate enough to meet several new friends, on both of the teams. There are a lot of quality people on the squads, it was my pleasure to report on their journey, and I hope that our paths cross more often.
The past couple weeks has made me wonder about journalism, and if I could see myself being a journalist as a career choice. Over the long-term, I’m still doubtful. As a short-term career, I think it has a lot of potential. Ideally, I would like to do a couple of years of journalism, finish a master’s degree, work for a post-secondary institution and improve it’s quality of education, and hopefully write a few books. Maybe then I’ll settle down and teach. Nobody knows what the future holds, but I believe mine will be a bright one.

The past two weeks have been very important for me. I’ve had the privilege of doing some interviews for articles I’m writing, and I was able to learn a lot of interesting things. I also had the privilege of having a job interview with Laurentian University for their new position of Web and Social Media Marketing Intern. First off, I did not get the job, but was on the short list of candidates.
I would like to speak about a few other things before discussing that.
I had the opportunity to sit down with Chris Mercer, chief of staff of Laurentian University for an interview concerning an article I’m working on. The article will be on College students transferring into University after they are finished at college, primarily. During the interview, we spoke of the directions that Laurentian is going, the social media landscape, and I found out that the job I applied for in December, was still vacant. I was privileged to interview Laurentian President Dominic Giroux, who also informed me about Laurentian’s vision moving forward. In my opinion, there are great things on the horizon for Laurentian University.
Aside from the professional portion of my discussions with them, we were also able to talk on a personal level. It was nice to gain some outside perspective on how my life is going, and on my potential for the future. The support I’ve been given from individuals such as Cambrian’s Irene Nizzero, Laurentian/Fraser Strategies’ Conway Fraser, Laurentian’s Julie Lacroix and Chris Mercer has been overwhelmingly positive. The support from my friends has also been positive, whether I’m speaking of my journalism comrades such as Nic Dugas, Ron Guillet, or Stephanie Daoust; my long-term friends Kyle Chapados, Jay Ceskauskas, and Justin Ceskauskas; or my family, which is to say, mostly Edward, but also my parents to some degree. Thank you all for your support, and for your kind advice.
This brings me to the point of this blog: moving forward from here. Getting rejected is never an easy thing, in life or in love, especially when it’s for a job that one feels they are more than qualified for. My credentials spoke for themselves, and the interview went well, to be modest about it. I have no regrets about trying for the job, or about being rejected for it.
My one issue with an interview like the one I had, is the value of my ideas. I pitched some great ideas about how to get students engaged with the University, what sort of avenues to reach out to students on, and what marketing policies will actually grab people’s attention. The marketing side of things is not my strongest feature, and I’m sure the marketing department already has their own ideas about it. The social media aspect of it all, and the ideas I pitched there, are the point of conflict for me.
During the interview I outlined a communications strategy for connecting with students, and decreasing the divide between the institution and the student body. Several of these ideas should, and I imagine will, be used in some form or another, by the University.
Does that bother me? The short answer is yes. I thought of those ideas, I researched those ideas and I presented those ideas. I will not receive credit for those ideas, thanks for those ideas, or consultation about where those ideas go. Basically, I sat down for a 45 minute interview, expounded a ton of ideas about social media, and ways it can be used to market to students, Then I wrote a half hour test that involved designing a marketing strategy for two separate real-life marketing situations (of which I will not discuss due to the confidentiality I feel the University deserves concerning their interview process). In a nutshell, my ideas were free.
So what bothers me about it? Ideas are common, but good ideas are hard to come by. Some of the ideas I pitched are good ideas. They will allow the University to launch a new marketing campaign using social media, which is an area of true weakness with a lot of post-secondary education institutions in my opinion, and have very real implications for the University. Usually when you bring somebody in to consult you, and give you fresh new ideas, it’s on a paid basis.
Some people may suggest that this is just part of the game of job interviews, but I find that hard to accept. It seems to be a catch 22: if I throw out these great ideas, I increase my chances of landing the job, but If I save them, I definitely will not be hired. It’s a tricky situation, and I don’t think there’s anything that can be done about it in favour of the interviewee. In this case, it felt very much as if I were a student at the institution once more but instead of feeding ideas for free to professors, it was to a marketing department.
All of that being said, I hold no ill will towards the University, and do not feel they’ve acted wrongly in any way, shape or form. This concept is bigger than a single institution, or single interviewee. I enjoyed the experience of walking into a room and being questioned by three individuals who I did not know, about a topic I truly care for. It was wonderful to have the chance to discuss social media, and its importance, with a committee of persons employed by a university which I am fond of.
The first thought that came into my mind when I got the phone call informing me I did not get the job, was my inability to speak and write french fluently. With a bilingual institution like Laurentian, that is a major setback to one’s employment chances I believe.
In this day and age, should it be though? I don’t believe so, and could spend hours arguing the merits of my point, but it is not worth dwelling on that point.
Maybe I just wasn’t good enough. Failure is something a person has to face, and become stronger for facing. I’ve always identified the phoenix as the mythical creature that represents me the best, and now everybody is going to see the truth in my selection. A new fire has been lit, and there will be no stopping it. What I am now, is nothing compared to what I will become.