I have felt some of the lowest emotions of my short life in the past two weeks. This will not come as a surprise to my friends or family. Without going into details, few things worse than what have happened over the last two weeks could happen to bomb a person's life.

This is not woe-is-me. In fact, I want to speak wih hope and optimism for the future. Just over a week ago, I lost my mover and yesterday, I lost that friend. Not lost in a sense of detah, but maybe permanently lost all the same. What difference a Christmas makes.

Last Christmas I almost bought a ring, and this Christmas is driven towards a strong hatred. The hatred I have dropped, it has not been easy. I awoke this morning shaking with rage, I sat down and watched both hands shaking uncontrollably. There was only one way life could go from here, and there are less than a handful of moment spent here on the bedrock.

Ths hatred has gone, a steely resolve to move forward has taken over. The love remains, despite the events that have led to this circus. To be clear, the fult does not rest with any one individual. A multitude of failues and mistakes needed to take place for everything to come together as it did. Mistakes on my part, mistakes on her part, and that;s the nature of the beast.

We walk into commitment with our own failings as people, and we hope that we can somehow weather the storm. Sometimes the storm is too much, or it tears the roof off our houses. Sometimes the roof can be repaired, but occasionally it just gets patched up until it breaks again. It never ends.

In the end, there is only love. You can hate, and you can be betrayed. You can suffer and wallow in it. These things never overcome love, no matter how brutal they are.